Onion News Network - Season 2

Onion News Network - Season 2

Season 2

Network
DatesOct 4, 2011 - Dec 9, 2011
Previous Season

Episodes

Asteroid Heads to Earth
Season 2Episode 130 min

Asteroid Heads to Earth

With a giant asteroid expected to hit Earth on October 4th, the Onion News Network has announced it will continue broadcasting until the moment the planet is destroyed.
Oct 4, 2011
Missing Baby Kate
Season 2Episode 230 min

Missing Baby Kate

Cross Examination's Shelby Cross leads a crusade to rip through every home in America to search for missing one-year-old Baby Kate. In the FactZone, Brooke and the ONN team reveal an extremist obese society's foiled attempts to kidnap Michelle Obama and O'Brady Shaw takes a drunk driving victim's death so personally that the victim's family must take a break from their own grief to comfort O'Brady. In other news, reports show that the iPhone 5 will come conveniently packaged with rumors about the iPhone 6.
Oct 11, 2011
Fantasy Brainwall
Season 2Episode 330 min

Fantasy Brainwall

FactZone introduces its newest piece of technology: an updated touchscreen that Tucker can control with his mind. Unfortunately for Tucker, the new "Brainwall" starts to display Tucker's darkest thoughts. Also, O'Brady's compassion for stray earthquake victims goes a little too far, when he starts "mercifully" killing dogs to relieve them after the disaster. Brooke reports on a coma-bound Republican Presidential candidate who is polling surprisingly well due to his lack of politically disastrous gaffes, and Rapper Kanye West faces down the nation of Syria in a Twitter battle over who was chanting first.
Oct 18, 2011
Dead Reporter
Season 2Episode 430 min

Dead Reporter

FactZone says goodbye to legendary newsman, Brandon Armstrong, who was killed in a brothel fire. Shelby Cross admonishes parents not to let their children trick-or-treat during Halloween, or what she refers to as the "Pedophiles' Christmas." Autistic Reporter, Michael Falk, asks the tough questions about a search and rescue mission's dismal chances of finding missing hikers and the First Responders react to the latest GOP debate, that they may or may not have even watched.
Oct 25, 2011
Exposed, Brooke Alvarez
Season 2Episode 530 min

Exposed, Brooke Alvarez

A revealing documentary airs on public television about Brooke Alvarez's secret life as a Russian child cosmonaut . Brooke is forced to relive the traumatizing experience of being trapped in a space shuttle with a vicious chimpanzee named Mr. Dmitry. Also, the U.S. government hires the genius behind Zico coconut water to try to help America out of its economic hole and a prostitute is caught paying Mitt Romney for sex.
Nov 1, 2011
Today Now! Special
Season 2Episode 630 min

Today Now! Special

The network morning show stages a very special takeover.
Nov 11, 2011
Sex in America
Season 2Episode 730 min

Sex in America

A report on sex in America.
Nov 18, 2011
Artificial Intelligence
Season 2Episode 830 min

Artificial Intelligence

The studio gains artificial intelligence and falls in love with Brooke, millions across the country are dangerously trapped in an Animal Hoarders marathon, and Jean Anne Whorton investigates the cruel underground blood sport of spouse fighting.
Nov 25, 2011
Brooke vs. O'Brady
Season 2Episode 930 min

Brooke vs. O'Brady

O'Brady Shaw joins Brooke on FactZone as her cohost to promote his new special "The Cries of the Children." A loud woman accountant is bothering the whole nation with her grating chatter. And a new weight loss drug is being released onto the market that curbs eating by making the user hallucinate that their food is a swarm of vicious, bloodthirsty monsters.
Dec 2, 2011
Year in Review
Season 2Episode 1030 min

Year in Review

The gang looks back on 2011.
Dec 9, 2011

Recently Updated Shows

Recently updated shows that might be of your interest.
Saturday Night Live
Running

Saturday Night Live

Saturday Night Live is an Emmy Award-winning late-night comedy showcase.

Since its inception in 1975, "SNL" has launched the careers of many of the brightest comedy performers of their generation. As The New York Times noted on the occasion of the show's Emmy-winning 25th Anniversary special in 1999, "in defiance of both time and show business convention, 'SNL' is still the most pervasive influence on the art of comedy in contemporary culture." At the close of the century, "Saturday Night Live" placed seventh on Entertainment Weekly's list of the Top 100 Entertainers of the past fifty years.

Bering Sea Gold
Running

Bering Sea Gold

In the frontier town of Nome, Alaska, there's a gold rush on. But you've never seen gold mining like this before -- here, the precious metal isn't found in the ground. It's sitting in the most unlikely of places: the bottom of the frigid, unpredictable Bering Sea. And there are a handful of people willing to risk it all to bring it to the surface in Bering Sea Gold.

Gold Rush: White Water
Running

Gold Rush: White Water

Gold miners Dakota Fred and his son Dustin are back - returning to McKinley Creek Alaska, determined to make a fortune no matter the risk. But to find the big gold payout, they'll put their lives on the line by diving deep beneath the raging waters of one of Alaska's wildest creeks.

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters
Running

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters

After surviving Godzilla's attack on San Francisco, Cate is shaken yet again by a shocking secret. Amid monstrous threats, she embarks on a globetrotting adventure to learn the truth about her family—and the mysterious organization known as Monarch.

Anne Rice's Mayfair Witches
Running

Anne Rice's Mayfair Witches

Anne Rice's Mayfair Witches centers on an intuitive young neurosurgeon who discovers that she is the unlikely heir to a family of witches. As she grapples with her newfound powers, she must contend with a sinister presence that has haunted her family for generations.