The Gnomes of Dulwich - Season 1

Big, Small, and Old are three stone gnomes who live in the front garden of No. 25 Telegraph Road. All three appear to lead such serene lives, Big fishing with his rod, Old fast asleep holding his spade, and Small feeding his frog all day. But their serenity is not all it might seem at first glance. Even stone gnomes can have trouble, trouble with the neighbours - especially when they are different.

The Gnomes of 25 Telegraph Road have a dilemma. Small's conscience is troubled - he feels 'different' when he is holding one of the girl gnomes from next door in his arms. There is only one answer - 'We must consult a higher authority' says Big. 'We must consult the Tope Gnome.'

To the occupants of the garden of 25 Telegraph Road the 'Human Beans' world sometimes looks a lot of fun. But parties with drink, singing and dancing can look better than they are, and sometimes it's a good thing to be on the outside looking in, especially if your viewpoint is astro-gnomic.

'Once more into the breach, dear gnomes'... this is Big's battle-cry in tonight's story, when the Gnomes of 25 Telegraph Road go to war. It is a war about an oppressed minority which Small tries to settle peacefully, but Big seizes the opportunity to enhance a new bellicose inventiveness.

This week the occupants of the garden of 25 Telegraph Road awake to find another gnome sharing their pool. An inspection reveals the newcomer to be an exact replica of Big - a closer look reveals a further kinship. They are both from the R.H.S.G.C. the Royal Hertfordshire Stone Gnome Company. Two gnomes like Big in one garden? A personality clash must ensue.