The Dick Van Dyke Show - Season 3

Season 3
Episodes

That's My Boy??
During a flashback about his early days as a parent, Rob recounts why he believed Laura and he brought home a baby belonging to someone else.

The Masterpiece
Rob's unguarded gestures at an auction have him unwittingly bidding on and winning an ugly clown painting that covers another work beneath, perhaps a masterpiece.

Laura's Little Lie (1)
Rob would like to know why Laura disappears every time his insurance agent Ed Rubin comes over or calls. Laura is forced to confess to Rob that she lied about her age on their marriage certificate and that she was 17 instead of the 19 that she claimed to be. Rob has to now find out whether he and Laura are still legally married.

Very Old Shoes, Very Old Rice (2)
Rob and Laura must go out of town to make their marriage legal without their friends finding out, but a marital squabble before Judge Krata might prevent it.

All About Eavesdropping
Having unintentionally eavesdropped on the Helpers, Rob and Laura become infuriated just prior to attending their dinner party, making for a seriously disquieting evening.

Too Many Stars
As director of the annual area variety show, Rob finds himself trapped between casting Laura as this year's leading woman (again) or a dazzlingly talented newcomer to the neighborhood.

Who and Where Was Antonio Stradivarius?
After receiving a bump on the head at the office, Rob develops temporary amnesia and winds up at a swinging party in New Jersey with no idea how he got there.

Uncle George
When Uncle George comes for a visit, they try to fix him up with Herman's mother only to have him flip for Sally.

Big Max Calvada
A man with suspected underworld connections asks Rob, Sally and Buddy to write a comedy routine for his untalented nephew - a favor they fear for their lives to either decline or accept.

The Ballad of the Betty Lou
Rob and Jerry's friendship is sorely tested when they buy a boat together.

Turtles, Ties and Toreadors
Rob hires a maid through the classifieds and ends up with a woman fresh from Barcelona who speaks no English, has a broken arm, and expects to work as a live-in.

The Sound of the Trumpets of Conscience Falls Deafly on a Brain That Holds Its Ears...
Rob struggles between his civic duty and fear for his family's safety when he believes he can identify the two robbers in a jewelry store holdup.

The Alan Brady Show Presents
The Alan Brady Show puts on a special Christmas themed episode full of musical numbers and Christmas fun.

The Third One from the Left
Rob becomes the victim of undying gratitude and amorous attentions when he elevates a talented young chorus girl to a featured role on the show.

My Husband is the Best One
Rob's job is threatened, and his work relationships throttled, by a news article praising him more than Alan for the success of The Alan Brady Show, all thanks to Laura.

The Lady and the Tiger and the Lawyer
A suave bachelor moves in next door, and Rob and Laura compete as matchmakers. Rob sets him up with Sally, and Laura arranges a date with her clumsy but sophisticated cousin.

The Life and Love of Joe Coogan
By pure chance, the tall, handsome, stud bachelor Rob meets at the golf course used to write love sonnets to Laura, which she kept.

A Nice, Friendly Game of Cards
A social game of poker turns sour when it's discovered Rob has been playing with a marked deck.

Happy Birthday and Too Many More
Rob makes a lot of trouble for himself when he decides to hold Ritchie's birthday party at home rather than at an amusement park -- for sixty three screaming kids.

The Brave and the Backache
Rob consults a psychiatrist to determine whether a series of mysterious ailments is psychosomatic.

The Pen is Mightier Than the Mouth
Buddy and Rob are left writing the script without Sally when she becomes a hit as a regular guest on late night talk show.

My Part-Time Wife
With Sally away, Laura wants to help Rob at the office. He resists, but his inability to find even remotely adequate help forces him to relent, and sparks fly when her success outshines his security.

Honeymoons Are for the Lucky
Rob recalls the hectic time of his Army marriage to Laura, and their trouble getting away for a honeymoon.

How to Spank a Star
A sultry, yet manipulative guest star has Mel replaced by Rob as producer for her appearance on the Alan Brady Show, much to Rob's discomfort.

The Plots Thicken
The Petrie's parents fight over where Laura and Rob should be buried. They have to decide which burial plot to choose without upsetting their in-laws.

Scratch My Car and Die
Laura dreads telling Rob about the big passenger side scratch she found on their brand new car when she went shopping in it.

The Return of Edwin Carp
Alan Brady is on vacation so Rob arranges for Edwin Carp and other stars of the golden era of radio comedy to guest on a tv special.

October Eve
Laura once commissioned an artist for a portrait of herself. The painter took artistic license, rendering her nude and now has the painting on display in an art gallery for all to see.
Note: This episode was colorized and shown on CBS-TV on December 22, 2017, and again on July 3, 2020 to mark the passing of Carl Reiner as it was one of his favorite episodes of the series.

Dear Mrs. Petrie, Your Husband is in Jail
With Laura out of town for a few days, Rob tries to figure out what to do in his spare time. Eventually, he looks in on an old Army buddy, who is at a nightclub. Unfortunately, it results in confusion that ultimately lands Rob behind bars.

My Neighbor's Husband's Other Life
Rob and Laura spot their neighbor Jerry at a fancy restaurant with a pretty blonde. They suspect him of having an affair, and his lack of candor seems to confirm their fears. They try to squirm out a confession and save his marriage.

I'd Rather Be Bald Than Have No Head at All
Fearing he may be going bald, Rob tries a dubious homemade remedy formulated by Buddy's barber.

Teacher's Petrie
Laura takes a creative writing course, and the teacher extols Laura's writing abilities. Rob infers from this unwarranted attention that Mr. Caldwell is using Laura to meet him. In fact, Mr. Caldwell's interest is only in Laura.
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